Mutually Assured Destruction

The Cold War was a weird time for our country. The enemy that we feared was the Soviet Union, yet we never had any direct military conflict with them. Imagine the two nations like the biggest kids in the neighborhood staring at each other, eye to eye, waiting for the other to make the first move.

Many historians have theories as to why the USA and the Soviet Union never fought each other, but one idea is called mutually assured destruction. This school of thought states that the Soviet Union never used their nuclear weapons to blast the USA because they were afraid that we would fire back and that the USA did not fire for the same reasons. These historians basically agree that if the USA and the Soviet Union had ever used their nuclear weapons then neither country would have won, but they would have only destroyed each other. Hence the name.... mutually assured destruction.

But how does this apply to a middle school? Unfortunately, I have seen many people firing away in the school setting without regard to what destruction may lay ahead! Let me explain...

As a teacher, we often have the ability to take care of issues in a more diplomatic way and have to resist the urge to pull out the "big guns" of getting into a student's face and yelling. Yes, we have to enforce rules, but do we have to get so emotional about the situation? Don't we know that the students are only going to defend themselves by getting louder and yelling back? I wonder what we think we will accomplish by using this destructive form of discipline with students who could most use some calm in their lives.

Why not rise above it and show them a better way? If you think about it, the main reasons students yell at teachers are because they have been hurt and want to repay the favor to someone else or, by upsetting the teacher, they distract attention away from the original behavior. It has been my experience that the most good has come from those times that I have checked my emotions at the door and focused on the actions that I want to see improved. I don't react to the volume of the student's voice or any whiny, hurtful thing they may say. Instead, I try to keep their attention on the fact that their behavior was poor at this time, and that in the future I would like them to try making a better decision.

In the end, you have to ask yourself, what kind of healthy, working relationship has ever been born of dislike or hostility? Whenever teachers mash the button to unleash their emotions, they only create a landscape of destruction not suitable for growth. We must work hard to avoid letting our classrooms and hallways meltdown into this cycle of mutually assured destruction before more crucial items are lost, most importantly our credibility in the eyes of others and the relationships we have with our students.

-Mr. F