Testing Reality

Once again the topic of testing rears its ugly head. Just like many schools around the country, mine is making a few changes in an attempt to affect student achievement and test scores...but that is for another day.

I want to give thought to what is considered a success when it comes to testing. What percentage of kids need to pass before we say "good job" to our schools?
100%... 60%... 75%...90%?

I have never subscribed to the No Child Left Behind theory that 100% (too high) of our students will pass all their tests by 2014. I have also never liked the ridiculous 50% (too low) that is required of students to pass some of the end-of-year subject tests.

For me, 80% is a good baseline to shoot for with test scores. Now before you label me a pessimist (I prefer realist!), let me give two reasons how I came to this number... free will and "life happens."

Unlike using numbers to keep track of sales at a business, test scores fail to paint the full picture when a student flat out refuses to engage in their education or assessments. This maybe a lack of relationship with student, but regardless, it's near impossible to make humans do something when they have their minds set against it.

On the other hand, sometimes "life happens," and students don't test as well as they normally would. Even if you have the best teachers and most attentive students throughout the year, life events can happen that cause them to lose focus. Recovering from being sick, social drama, a family member dies... all of these would give an adult trouble, even more so a child.

So... You may tell me 19% failed, but I say 81% passed, and that ain't bad!

Anticipation...

Summer is coming to a close and my thoughts are starting to drift back to the classroom.

-I wonder if I will be able to connect with this group of kids as well as those of the past.
-Where can I improve in my presentation, relationships, and demeanor?
-Will they leave in May feeling stronger and better than when they arrived?

...but most of all, I'm just grateful for a career that I can commit my MIND, BODY, and SOUL to everyday.

I'll leave you with one of my favorite quotes about a teacher's role in the classroom.  See you in the hallways. :)

“I’ve come to a frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It’s my personal approach that creates the climate. It’s my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized.”
--Haim G. Ginott

Phone Home!

So this is going to be a little bit of a rant. :(

There is a pet peeve of mine that has been steadily growing over the last year or so.

Bad or no contact information for parents!

It just blows my mind that someone is willing to drop off their child for 8 hours of the day without a way for the people in charge to easily get in contact with them.

I know that some parents get tired of hearing from the school in regards to discipline issues, but what if something serious were to happen to your child? How are school staff supposed to let you know if something has affected the health or safety of your child when the phone numbers in our computer are disconnected or for places that you longer live or work at?

In the end, I find it ridiculous that adults will not hesitate to keep their magazine or TV subscription information current, but when it comes to doing the same for your child's school, it just slips their mind. Sounds like a serious case of misplaced priorities!

So... if you have kids in school (or will have kids in school), be sure to keep that contact information up-to-date for your child's sake!

The Relativity of Time

It has always amazed me how quickly my middle school students can ride an emotional roller coaster from high to low and back again.

--Best friends, worst enemies, and back to friends in the span of a few days.
--They're in love, out of love, and back again within weeks.
--You're their favorite teacher, you're the worst because you called them out on their poor behavior/choices, and by the end of the week, you're once again the best.

This strikes me as a very tiring way to live, but...
Over the last few years, I think I have come up with a explanation for this seemingly odd behavior, and it has helped me to be more understanding of the students in my room.

Basically, I believe, that students and adults experience time differently. Shocking, right?! Seriously though... I haven't run the math, but think about it. One week of time is a higher percentage of a 12 year-old's life than it is for a 30 year-old. Just as a week for that same 30 year-old is larger chunk of his/her life when compared to a 70 year-old. This has led me to construct a (very) rough conversion chart for how my students (12-13 year-old's) experience time compared to me (31 year-old).

The way I see it, one day for my students is equivalent to one week for me, and if they have to wait one week for something to arrive, it is similar to me waiting a month. This view has cleared up a lot of misconceptions that I have had in years past.

For example, I used to get frustrated when I gave an assignment weeks in advance and then watch them wait until the last few days to get it done. I now see that two weeks down the road is in the far distant future from their points-of-view. I also realized that I do the same in my life! While I don't necessarily wait until the deadline if I am given two months (teenage equivalent of two weeks) to get something done, I will usually gather information and then relax a few weeks before getting down to business.

Let that sink in for a bit, and you might come to understand that a kid's use of time, while sometimes confusing to someone older, is not them trying to be defiant or irritating on purpose, but just how they experience time during that stage of life.

Attack of the Tech!!!

It seems computer technology in the classroom has been the BIG push over the last few years around here. On the face of it, this idea sounds fine, but something about spending large amounts of money to snatch up the latest in technology has not sat well with me.

Don't get me wrong... I have seen some awesome things done with SmartBoards, iPads, and computers in many small remediation and special education clasrroms around the district, but the reality is that a majority of teachers have a 25+ to 1 teacher/student ratio.

For me, all these technological devices are tools that best used when applied to the situations that call for them. For example, hammers are great tools for putting nails into place, but they do not work so well when dealing with screws. Sure... it is possible to get that screw into the board, but wouldn't it have been easier to just grab a screwdriver? I think this is part of the problem with computers (laptops, desktops, and/or tablets) in the classroom. Too many times we throw out the traditional form of educating our kids (teacher/student relationship) in favor of a new way that depends heavily on technology (computer/student relationship). We have elevated computer technology from the status of mere tools to something almost human in intelligence.

We give extra value to computer technology because of this warped view, but I believe this shift is not beneficial in the long run and just adds to the cycle of American schools jumping from fad to fad. Let me try and explain.

--Computer technology is NO replacement for the work of a good teacher, especially in the K-3rd grade levels. No amount of computers can make up for a kid missing out on the basics of reading, writing, and math at such an early age. Instead of spending money on computers, shouldn't we FIRST focus on getting those basics taught and understood by our students? I think we could best accomplish this by hiring more K-3 grade teachers to get the teacher/student ratio down. As it is, ONE teacher successfully teaching 25+ lower elementary students to read, write, and do math is nothing short of a miracle! If you don't believe me, just try teaching anything to a room full of 7 year-old kids by yourself and see how it turns out. :)

--Speaking of large amounts of students... I have found that all this computer technology usually leads schools deeper into a money pit. As school districts struggle toward the goal of "a computer for each student," they usually rack up a hefty bill along the way. (Again, if computers were viewed as tools meant to be applied to the correct situation and NOT all of them, we wouldn't be fighting to buy so many.) Even when districts do reach this lofty goal, it is usually years down the road, and means that it is time to start buying replacements for the original, aging equipment. All of these purchases add up to big bucks that I cannot help but think could be better spent on hiring more teachers, especially at the elementary level.

--There has also been a lot said lately about preparing students for technology in the workplace. I think this idea has been a big reason behind the push for computer technology, but let's think about it for a second. How much computer technology is REALLY needed in most jobs? If you think it through honestly, you'll find that most jobs do not require much more than skills in word processing, internet navigation/research, and cable connections. For everything else, this is what the company's technology department is hired to accomplish. What about the jobs that DO require a high level of computing expertise? That training, more often than not, comes from post-high school classes or on the job training after being hired.

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That being said, I love computer technology and all the fancy devices that make my life easier and more entertaining, but when do we sit back and think hard about how these devices impact our students and if that is money well spent?
So you want to give my school money for an additional teacher OR computers for everyone?
I know which one I would choose every time!

A Teacher's Thanksgiving

Before we dive head first into the commercial and capitalist season known as "the holidays," I thought I would take the time to list a few things I am thankful for as a teacher.

-Having a job
-Thoughtful kids
-My map pointer (aka: lightsaber)
-Post-It notes
-"What Would You Like To Know"
-Copy machines that work
-Supportive principals
-My standing desk (Grok on!)
-IMAX videos
-11:15 coffee break with the 6th grade giant
-"Good Things"
-Joking with students
-The Teacher indoor soccer team
-Asking questions

Hope everyone has a good break.

T.O.Y.

It's that time of year, voting for our school's teacher of the year has begun.

...And while it is hard to get excited about the process that encourages us to NOT vote for the "best" teacher, but the one who is the "finest example of the profession" (aka... the teacher who will look the best on the forms they fill out for the district T.O.Y. competition), I began thinking back to teachers I had in school that had an impact on me.

What I have found that makes a good teacher isn't necessarily what they teach a student, but how they make that student feel. As the years have gone by, I have forgotten some of the content taught, but I still remember leaving a class feeling smart, important, and even liked, which sometimes made all the difference.

As for my schooling, I know plenty teachers I had who match that definition, whether it was the way they managed their classes, the passion they put into their job, or just how they treated me in general... they are important to me.

So thank you Mrs. Hubbard, Mr. Jenkins, Coach Butcher, and Mrs. Harris. I don't know if you have won any awards, but I appreciate everything you did.

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What about you? Feel free to leave a comment below about any teacher that made an impression on you.

Own It!!!

I recently had a conversation with some former students that was really insightful and thought I would share here.

After the usually catching up, the classic topic between parents and kids came up... discipline. One of the kids had recently made some poor choices at school. As punishment, the kid had been grounded and had some items taken away. Of course, the kid thought this was not fair.

I tried to explain that kids have more control over their lives than they realize. Parents can only react to the behaviors and choices that kids give them. The trick is to own your life and take responsibility for your actions. If you are sick of getting in trouble, then stop making the choices that get you there. If you enjoy being rewarded and praised, then continue the behavior that got you rewarded.

I then explained that it is the same for teachers. We can blame our problems on the kids and their behaviors, or we can own our classrooms and figure out a way to improve them.
-Kids being disrespectful? Then I need to be better at modeling and giving respect to them.
-Class is too loud or chaotic? I might need to try a different management style.

So, are you blaming others (kids, parents, administration) for a lack of fulfillment in your classroom? ...But, who is in a better position to make things improve than you? How much better would your classroom be if you owned those problems and took it upon yourself to make a change?

I guarantee it will make a difference! :)

Disrespect... or acting their age?

I recently finished mentoring a student from a local university for his student-teaching experience. It was a good time of sharing ideas about students, curriculum, and the education system, but a couple of topics seemed to come up repeatedly... student behavior and classroom discipline.

Over the last few years, I have learned to differentiate between a student being disrespectful in class and one showing behavior that is appropriate for their age.
You see... it is easy to confuse the two and treat them the same, but that would be damaging to the relationship with your students and the long term management of your classroom.

Yes... sometimes kids decide to mouth off, overreact, and get themselves in trouble, but many times they are just acting their age, and things are escalated by the adults around them. Is having some boys horseplaying in the classroom or dealing with girls gossiping and being hurtful to each other the best part of my job? No, but that behavior is not from them intending to disrespect me, but more out of their not yet learning to control their impulses/behaviors in different environments.

Where the problem occurs is my reaction to the kids. I have found that the majority of the disruptions in my class come from age appropriate behavior and few come from a disrespect towards me. However, that reverses when educators fail to see the teaching moment in the students' poor choice of behavior and overreact to the situation. Treating the child's age-appropriate behavior as a personal attack on who they are as a teacher and their authority in the classroom only serves to escalate the emotional response. This often ends up with a student in the office not completely understanding what happened and with another story of an emotional, yelling teacher to tell their friends...and from there, the cycle continues. Kids behave like kids. Teachers take it personally and yell. Kids mistrust teachers.

I know... I know.... sometimes it really annoys us adults having to deal with childish behavior over and over, but shouldn't it be an opportunity to teach them a better way? Besides, according to this article, that behavior may be just what they MUST live through to be a productive adult in the future.

Once more into the breach...

I don't like repeating topics so soon, but it seems that testing is a popular topic lately. The unfortunate thing is that these tests and testing results are hard for educators to understand, much less the leaders and parents outside of the building ...and programs like No Child Left Behind only serve to confuse us even more.

The basic premise behind NCLB is that all children will meet a high level of skill in reading and math by 2014. No excuses! Now, of all the complaints about the NCLB program, several issues stand out to me, one dealing with human nature and the other with how testing results are interpreted by the government.

First, the nature of humans. We have tens of millions of children in our schools, and sometimes I wonder if our politicians and leaders confuse them for machines that just need the right programing. Too often they fail to take into account the outside influences that impact our children and blame those shortcomings on the schools and the teachers (For example, concerns about their neighborhood/community, financial status of the family, medical problems for themselves or a family member, lack of parental support, social expectations from peers, etc). All of these affect the school day of our students but are just brushed under the rug in regards to test results. A couple of test days out of 180 schools days is not a good gauge of our students' abilities, especially if that day is influenced by one of those examples mentioned above. Besides, when was the last time you ever saw a large group of (individualistic) human beings all do the same thing, on the same day, in the same way?

As for interpretations, it's not as simple as saying, "Since 86% of your students passed the test, you're a good school," or "Only 54% of your students failed the test, so you are a bad school." A school's student body is broken into many different categories such as gender, ethnicity, economic status, special education, and English language learners. These groups are then graded individually. So... a school could be doing well with 86% of the students passing the math test, BUT if one of those individual groups fail (male special education, female economically disadvantaged, African-American females, Caucasian males), then the school is considered to have failed as a whole. If that happens two years in a row, you are now a school that "needs improvement." Schools earn this title regardless of a large majority of the students passing the tests at the required levels.

So when I hear about things like this from the Feds and this from the State, I can start to hope that level heads will prevail when it comes to the education and future of our children.

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Before I sign off, let me clarify one thing... I'm not saying that we get rid of all accountability for schools. That would be a swing too far in the other direction. I just hope we can come to an agreement on a high standard of education for our children and stop moving the bar like some carnival game that you can never win.

To The Rescue!!!

There has been a LOT of talk in my building lately about testing and student scores. This is nothing new as it is seems that the education world revolves more and more around this particular assessment type. The frustrating part of the whole thing is that these tests, as most teachers can tell you, are not the most ideal way of checking to see if our kids are learning.

First off, the only tests that count towards the "grade" a particular school building receives are the Reading and Math tests. Don't get me wrong... math and reading are important. They are probably the most important areas of knowledge for kids as they build a solid foundation for learning throughout their lives. However, right from the start, we are leaving off all the other areas that students excel in during the school day (sciences, social studies, the fine/performing arts, athletics). I would hate to think that we are telling our future brilliant scientists and musicians that they are "dumb" just because they happen to be average at reading and math. It's funny how we are told the importance of multiple intelligences in planning our lessons, but fail to reward them within the educational system.

Second, this "testing only" method of grading our students and schools can cause unneeded levels of stress for the students AND the teachers. Yes, the final product is often the thing that matters most in real world jobs, but the work and effort leading up to that moment can be just as important in helping someone learn and grow. This concentration on the end result often means that our children are being trained to take a test instead of engaging in meaningful learning. (I haven't even mentioned the temptation to cheat on these tests to inflate the results. I'll just let you Google "testing scandal" to catch up on the latest news on this growing problem.)

Third, I believe that many of the politicians, administrations, and companies in the driver's seat of our education system have ulterior motives. Many leaders will ignore a long-term solution (class size) in favor of the short term (buying programs/technology that often go unused). These people will profess their desire to help the children, but, in reality, it is about having something successful to point at when re-election time comes around. What about the testing companies?! They make LOTS of money off of the current system, and I don't think they will be giving up that cash cow anytime soon!

So... What about a solution?!? Like most things in life... the answer is simple, but it is often hard to put into practice. Here are a few ideas I believe could make a BIG difference.

Smaller class size in elementary schools. Many studies will talk about the importance of building a solid educational foundation with our youngest students, but schools will often see their highest student-to-teacher ratio in these critical K-3rd grade classrooms. I would LOVE to see no more than 15 students in our early elementary classrooms. I believe that many of the students who struggle academically today do so because they fell through the cracks in those crowded settings and failed to develop critical skills in reading and math.

Rearrange our priorities. Just as a healthy lifestyle can often save a person the pain and expense of medical problems later in life, a good education can empower people to take charge of circumstances in their lives and see the options (both short-term and long) available to them. As teachers and school districts, we can do this by continuing to focus on proven strategies and avoid tying up our resources in educational fads or buying items that only serve the purpose of making us look good for the local newspaper or TV report. Also, parents should constantly remind their children that their education is a process that will see benefits down the road. Be their external motivation to keep going (when they want to quit) until they mature and develop the internal motivation that drives most successful adults.

Read! I cannot overstate the importance of reading. Many of us cannot afford to see and experience the many wonders that our world offers, but through reading, we have those wonders and stories at our fingertips. Reading allows us to stretch beyond ourselves. We learn of the successes and problems of others throughout history, and we gain the ability to see the world through the eyes of others, both of which are crucial in becoming a tolerant and productive citizen.

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My teacher friends and I often joke about being able to solve the dilemmas in our educational system if the various leaders in our field and country would just listen to us, but I don't think that will happen anytime soon. However, I have left my pessimism behind years ago.
I truly believe that, if teachers don't get bogged down in what we can't control and focus on the bright, eager students we are given each year, things will turn out for the best more often than not! :)

Early Days

It's still early in the year, but I thought would share a couple of stories that have happened so far. These are the kind of little things that keeps this teacher coming back for more!

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Being a social studies teacher, I REALLY like using Dr. Mark Forget's teaching methods. His activities are a great way to integrate reading and writing skills into my curriculum.

One of his activities is called an "Anticipation Guide." I had passed out the guide to kids and was going over how it was used, but one little girl was adamant that she use her own notebook paper because she didn't want to get the Guide "messy." I laughed, but insisted that it was okay to write all over my worksheet. After some huffing, puffing, and pouty lips, she put her notebook paper aside, and we finished the activity.

So imagine my surprise the next day when I am grading papers and her notebook paper is stapled to the back of the guide worksheet I gave her. My first reaction of irritation quickly subsided as I flipped over to her notebook paper, only to find the paper blank except for three words near the bottom, "Love This Class."

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I am pleasantly surprised each year by the number of eighth grade students that say they miss my class from the year before. ESPECIALLY, the students that I felt like I was constantly having conversations with about poor behavior choices and being responsible for their actions. So it was quite a surprise when one such student came up to me with an announcement while I was walking to my car after school.

"Mr. Farnham, I want to be a teacher when I grow up because of you."

Now I don't know how serious he is, but if, at the least, my words and actions have caused him to take school a little more seriously, that is great, and if he does grow up to join the teaching field, then I hope I have been a good example of how to treat students while getting them to learn about the world and themselves.

Reflection vs. Self-reflection

"Oh yeah... I reflect on my actions and learn from my mistakes." That is a phrase that many claim is true, but I wonder if it really happens. After thinking this over, I believe many people (teachers, parents, and students alike) confuse the process of reflection and self-reflection.

Now wait a second, Teach! Is there really even a difference?! I believe so!

Reflection is simply the act of looking back on past events or interactions with others. We look at the events and people involved, begin to draw conclusions, and make plans for how it all could of been improved if OTHERS would have done it differently.

On the other hand, self-reflection keeps the focus on yourself! It is less about what others have done and more importantly focused on what I could have done to do or be better in the situation. Considering that I am the only human that I can control 100% of the time, I find this the best approach when dealing with the circumstances around me.

I find that because of this difference, self-reflection will lead to more growth for you as a person. In thinking of ways to improve yourself, avoiding the need to place the blame for your problems elsewhere, you build a solid foundation from which to own your life instead of depending on others.

So as we get back into the routines of the school year and dealing with our students and curriculum, are you looking for ways to strengthen yourself and become a better educator (self-reflection), or do you prefer to seek out parents, administrators, students, or policies to blame for your problems (reflection)?

Whether you own your situation and fix it or throw your hands up and look for someone to blame, life will go on, but wouldn't it feel better knowing you have some control over it?

My Mission Field and My Art...

The summer is almost over, and my thoughts have started to wander back to my upcoming mission trip. That's right... I just referred to my job teaching middle school as a mission trip! :)

...But, isn't that the best way to describe it? This annual, nine-month long trip is a big part of my life, and I give it as much energy and thought as I can spare from my family, my first priority. I love spending time with and helping the locals (middle school students) to visualize and strive for a better future, and I truly hope that teachers, as well as other professionals, can say the same for their outlooks on work!

In preparing for this school year, I have also been thinking about the idea of leaving a legacy and what that means. This is probably not an uncommon thought for most people because, no matter the person, at some point you begin to wonder what your life was worth, what you will leave behind for others, or how your friends and family will remember you.

I have thought of this before and realized that beyond my wife and kid... my students will be a large portion of the proof that I have done something useful with my life.

While some of you might find that depressing, it gives me a sense of focus, frees me from being weighed down with frivolous matters, and makes sure my energy is used on things that will matter in the long run.

Therefore, my classroom is more than a collection of tables and books... it's my workshop, and the students are my paints. I only hope, in the end, I will be remembered as the creator of true masterpieces and not some graffiti on a bathroom stall. :)

Woo Hoo!!!

This teacher is on his summer break!

I am currently enjoying my time off from work by hanging out with my wife and son, reading books, playing video games, visiting family, and trying to keep my little garden alive in the Oklahoma heat.

Now would be a great time to catch up on reading some of the older posts you have missed. ;)

I hope all the teachers and students are safe and enjoying themselves as well! See you in August 2011.

The 3 Questions, Part 3

The three questions students want answered by their teachers, but will never ask.

#3 - "Can I trust you?"

Trust requires relationship.
How is your relationship with your students? Do they come to you with problems big or small? Can they relate to you as another human being? Do you treat them as you want to be treated?

Thinking of my past experiences has made me realize that the people that I have trusted the most were those that I could relate to in one way or another.

The Golden Rule is an old concept, but still applies! You should treat the students in your classes in the same way that you would want if you were in their position. If you are doing any less then that, is it any wonder that you are having behavior and performance issues in your classes?

Recently, I have been reading a book for my Sunday School class, and the authors suggested that it may actually be more important for adults to earn the trust of their kids than the other way around. As parents, we should be most concerned with the hearts of our children. Unfortunately, sometimes fighting to keep our kids in line overshadows the fact that we are working with another human being and that our complete focus on obedience can have unintended consequences down the road. Obedience is a good goal, but without love and trust, it is a hollow victory.

Sooo.... are you fighting WITH or FOR your students? Are you actually concerned with their heart, their character, or are you just interested in keeping them in line to make your job easier?

I guarantee you that the students in your classroom can tell the difference!

The 3 Questions, Part 2

The three questions students want answered by their teachers, but will never ask.

#2 - "Do you care about me?"

If I look back on the teachers that I have known in my life, the ones that had the biggest impact on me, I start to find a common thread: They cared about me as a person.

Some may have wanted me to be more intelligent in my choices, some may have wished to give me a piece of their knowledge to help me along in life, others just saw potential and didn't want to see it wasted. All of these teachers cared about who I was and who I might become.

If you think about it, isn't that what every student is looking for? Isn't that what all relationships are based on... caring? I can guarantee you that a student will work harder and be less of a discipline issue when they know that you care. Don't get me wrong. Not every child will turn into a model student just because you take the time to get to know them better, and some may even rebel against it, but I prefer caring to be being false or cruel.

Let me be clear, this kind of caring has to be genuine and not based on something you want from the kid. ("If I talk nicely, then the class will behave.") Don't confuse caring with being nice. I am not talking about asking kids how their day is or complimenting them on their clothes. Caring is about seeking what is best for the student and taking the time to explain to them why you are doing what you do, not just beating them over the head with your words.

Remember.... kids can sniff out false words like dogs smell fear!

The 3 Questions, Part 1

The three questions students want answered by their teachers, but will never ask.

#1 - "Are you committed to your job?"

Well... are you? Do you strive to get better each day? Do you read to get new information about content or styles of teaching? Do you reflect on your interactions with the kids and try to make them meaningful?

Let's be honest. Who wants to work with, much less for, someone that does not put their best effort into what they do?

Soo... as we head into the final weeks of the school year and begin making our summer plans, take some time to to answer this 1st question for yourself. Are you committed to your job and being the best teacher you can be, or do you find excuses to cut corners? Do you blame other people (students, parents, administration) when your class does not go as planned? Do you find faults in the grading and discipline systems to justify lowering your commitment?

As an educator, it would be hypocritical to demand commitment from our students while allowing excuses to lower our own levels of commitment.

...And if you are not committed to your job as a teacher, well, then you owe it to yourself and the kids to get motivated or get out of education.

BEE Yourself...

Geek. Funny. Argumentative. Smart. Weird. Laid Back. Opinionated. Organized. Too Friendly. Too Strict. Different.
Nerd. Anti-Social. Childish. Friendly. Creepy. Confident. Mean. Good. Bad. Jerk. Favorite.

Sooo... What was that all about you ask?

Those are all names and descriptors I have heard used to define my classroom and me as a teacher, from both students and co-workers.

...And, you know, I am okay with all of them! Besides, can anyone really come up with a meaning of "normal" that includes more than just a small percentage of the human population? In the end, your definition of "normal" tends to develop into a picture very similar to yourself!

"Who am I?" "Am I normal?" or worse "Am I different?"
These are questions that all middle school students struggle with at some point during their years with us. They fight so hard to be liked by others and not stick out, all the while sacrificing a little bit of themselves at each turn in the process. I believe one of the biggest failings of classrooms is not reinforcing the fact that there is NO SUCH THING as "normal." Each student comes to us with unique intelligences and abilities, but, unfortunately for them, most teachers do not want unique. Most teachers want uniform... sameness... robots. They have tests to prepare students for, and their jobs would be so much easier if the kids would act the same... be "normal".
(Hey, Teachers!!! I have news for you. This picturesque, nonfluctuating classroom is NEVER going to happen!)

Maybe that is why I let my "normal" leak out all over the place. How else are kids supposed to understand that no one is normal, that we are all unique, if no one models this mindset? They do not get this from their friends, music, or TV/movies. Those sources are filled with images and words telling our kids how to act, talk, and look so they do not stand out in a crowd. Very robotic!

I also think that being comfortable with your personality and knowing who you are automatically makes you more lenient towards people. You become less judgmental of others just because they did not react the way you wanted or did not handle a situation the way you thought was best.

So teachers... Let's work on a couple of things. I think we should be more accepting of the uniqueness that is brought into our classroom by our students and learn to do the best with it. Second, shouldn't we be better at modeling how the "real" world works? We don't have to please everyone, and when differences arise with our friends/acquaintances, it is not the end of the world. Help the kids understand that it is fine to be quirky or like things that others may not by modeling it in our own behavior and words.

...Because, do we really want a world without variety?

Respect AND Relationship

So it seems that teachers are getting the concepts of respect and relationship in the classroom a little confused. Through numerous conversations and observations, it appears to me that many educators either assume that they are the same thing, or believe that, if they have respect, then a relationship will automatically grow.

It is my opinion that respect and relationship are different and manifest themselves differently in the classroom. I am NOT saying they do not influence each other, and I DO believe that certain levels of each are required to run a productive, memorable classroom, but before we can make our classrooms better, educators need to admit the difference and understand the two.

Let's start with respect. ("giving attention, hold in special regard")
This can be seen when the class "looks up" to the teacher. They pay attention when it is required and students generally do what has been asked of them. This level of respect from students is usually developed by one of two methods, demanding it or earning it. More often than not I hear the "demanding it" method (i.e."because I am the teacher") being used, but I personally prefer the "earning it" method. I know students should automatically respect me as a teacher, but how hard is it to humble myself and take a little bit of time earning their respect from time to time? It beats demanding it, not getting it, and then spending another school year whining about those disrespectful kids!

On to relationship. ("connecting, binding")
This is the more of intangible aspect of the classroom, and can be best expressed as a feeling that the teacher and student have toward each other while working in the classroom. Think back to some of your past, successful relationships (professional and personal). I am sure that, more than the things you did, it was how you felt being with them and when time came to part company, you felt better for having known them. This is how our students should feel about us!

I believe a decent standard for understanding and growing student relationships is the Golden Rule. Do you like being yelled at or being made to look dumb in front of your friends? Then don't do it to your students! If it would hurt your feelings, then more than likely it is the same for them. How many of you like to hear words of praise or feel important in your job? If so then why not set up ways of fostering those feelings in your students?

A quick example on the difference between respect and relationship. I have respect for the 60+ members of faculty and staff in my building, but I don't have a relationship with all of them. This means that, while I respect their professional abilities to do their jobs, I probably won't be asking them for favors any time soon. I just don't know them in that way. While this is fine for an adult, professional relationship, I don't believe it is the way to run a classroom.

I really do believe that respect and relationship BOTH have important roles to play in our classrooms and by failing to cultivate both we are ultimately setting up our time to be less effective than it could be. For a successful classroom environment, it really is about getting that perfect mixture of respect and relationship!

So, are you doing your best to promote respect AND relationship among your students?